I don’t fit in with people and all my life I believed that it’s because they don’t like me so why should I like them? But, the past few days I really felt like I was unwanted. The person I love is giving up on me because he says he doesn’t understand me, even though I try for him to understand me he still doesn’t. Am I really that hard to understand? I am literally tired and this one whole year I thought that this person knows who I am ends up giving up o me slowly. He is not as nice as before nor as sweet. I must have done something wrong, I said but when I asked, he said that I was abusive and a flirt to other guys. Is it really abusive just to ask for him to come to my house cause I miss him? Is it abusive to ask for a glass of water when I am feeling sick? I did what he wanted to. I tried to lower my stupid pride, but he pushes it too far and if I get jealous he says I am over-reacting and I just– I don’t know what to do. Whatever I say in this blog won’t change the fact that he is giving up on me.
(Edit: I never got to finish this cause I wrote it while crying and the feelings were too overwhelming that I just stopped typing and cried so much that I don’t have the courage to even write what I feel. I’m just literally done.)